i have 4 daughters...they are all my children. i don't have any of "my own". all of my kiddos are mine. i do have 2 children i birthed and 2 children that are adopted.
parents do not 'give up' their children. this one gets to me. no
parent ever just gives up a child. either a parent chooses adoption as a placement or their parental rights were terminated and the child is available for adoption.
if a child is adopted from another country, the child is not foreign, but the child is adopted from abroad.
my kids have ears...they understand what people say, so if you have questions about why we all look different, tell me that you are interested in adoption and would like to talk about it. then, we can do that without having the kiddos feel awkward.
adoption is different...it's not the norm. please don't try to make an adopted child feel special for the choice their birthparent made for them. it's hard when kids are different.
my kiddos birthparents are involved in their lives. they are good peeps. but you really don't need to know that unless you are sincerely asking about adoption.
i don't ask you how you got pregnant with your kids or how many cigs you smoke or if you ever did drugs in your life, so please don't assume OR ASK if my children's birthparents were addicts. first, it's none of your business. second, you really don't need to know. third, it's just rude. don't ask.
birthmom's rock the planet. if you've ever carried a child, you know how much love it would take to hand that child to another family and know that it's the best for the child. it's absolutely not self serving...not a cop out...not anything but a very, very difficult decision and choice.
so, you wanna know what love looks like? this is it. this is b and her birthmom, brit. brit is amazing!!! we love her soo much. she's def part of the fam and one of my kiddos now. we see her about every 4-6 weeks now and talk frequently on the phone. she's as much of our lives as b is.
and knowing that God really does have a sense of humor, that's not me in the pic, it's brit. yep...crazy nuts how much we look alike. this is b's bowling party for her #5!
Comments
"adoption is different...it's not the norm. please don't try to make an adopted child feel special for the choice their birthparent made for them. it's hard when kids are different."
"i don't ask you how you got pregnant with your kids or how many cigs you smoke or if you ever did drugs in your life, so please don't assume OR ASK if my children's birthparents were addicts. first, it's none of your business. second, you really don't need to know. third, it's just rude. don't ask."
Thanks for writing this post! You rock!
wow.
one more comment.
it seems as though the ones who feel entitled to an explanation into YOUR life are suffering from stupidity.
ANYWAY....I'm going to have to POST PICTURES of just how SERIOUS my paper addiction is...It's comical really...my feeling is that it's PAPER, no harm to anyone...except a few trees..but I can always plant more, right??
Yes, so it's great to meet a fellow paper addict! We MUST unite!! HA! :)
I just had to come over and say hello...
peace....
lori
You totally Rock National Adoption Awareness Month!!
~K
The worst I ever got was ....so you mean to say her real mom didn't even want her?
Let me tell you it took all the energy I had to not slap her!
The boys did refer to the day I married my husband as the day we "adopted" Uncle Jason.
Reading Wep's comment makes me think of how my kids talk about the day they were adopted. The refer to it as the day we got married. I love that.
How nice that you have such a special, open, relationship with her birth mom too...she's one lucky little girl!
LORI
i have not adopted any kids, BUT, i am adopted. things have really changed in 40 years. thank goodness.
good for you. beautiful girls you have.
Anyway. I wanted to let you know that I loved this. My mom put her son up for adoption in the 70's and there's been a whole path of things in my life attached to it. I'm 13 years his junior.
My SIL also recently adopted a little girl. I'm going to pass this post along to her - it'll definitely make her smile.
I do have a couple of questions for you though - honest, hopefully not rude - about open adoption. If your willing to answer, my e-mail is youngmomma.blog@gmail.com
Great tribute to BM ... I have had the privledge to foster several babies and when I did get to meet the BM I just hugged her neck and thought what a loving person and amazingly strong woman !!!