not me monday

a few things me and the fam DID NOT do the last TWO weeks...

we DID NOT have the worst flu ever in the  month of may in our house.  ryan DID NOT end up with strep and banned to the bedroom for 4 days straight. i DID NOT sleep in the basement to avoid the germies...

brooke DID NOT get a lapdesk for her artwork and writing things...she DID NOT take it to school to show her teacher and friends her "new briefcase".  she is NOT getting too big.

sofia DID NOT walk up to me with nasty  hands and say, "look mommy, doggie poopy. stinky, mommy. gross!"  she DID NOT continue to say, "stinky poopy taste yucky."  i DID NOT gag and start a bath!

i was NOT sick on monday...i DID NOT wake up to the messiest kitchen on the planet the next morning.  i was NOT angry or frustrated that a maid was NOT called in for back up.  i am NOT dreaming, btw.

jada DID NOT tell me this joke:

why did cinderella cross the road?

why?

because prince elvis was on the other side of the road, silly.

sofia DID NOT say to me the morning after i was sick, "starbucks mommy. donut for toe-pee (sofie). mommy get drink'.  that girl is NOT my bff and NOT on her a game even when she is sick.

hubs was NOT on a business trip in hollywood while me and the girlies were in good old indiana inthe rainy-ness...he was NOT getting pics and talking to joel mchale and the kardashians.  and omarosa DID NOT tell him he was "a very handsome and nice looking guy" and hand her booking card to him.  if she was NOT 7 feet tall, i would def NOT have to smack her face...

i DID NOT get to hang out with student impact hs kids on saturday night...i DID NOT get 4,362 mosquito bites...and almost burn kacie to death when dropped a log on the fire and embers flew.  i am NOT a much better "hang out leader" than a "fire keeper going-er leader".

hubs DID NOT tell me that the kardashian girls were really NOT pretty in person.  he also DID NOT say that the "tv is really good to them bc in person they are like 80's throwbacks that wouldn't even catch your eye."  i am NOT ever so grateful for a husband who knows when to make a wife feel like a million bucks...even when he lies a little about such things.

sofia DID NOT walk over to the cadillac, grab the handle and say, "get in cad-ah-wack and go to floor-ee-dah.  see mickey mouse again, mommy."  i do NOT wish it were that easy...

paige does NOT play in sectionals tonight...and she has NOT had a super fab year in varsity softball!